Once upon a time, way back in the heart of the late 90s, my Saturday evenings were reserved for a very special show. Mystery Science Theater 3000 began as an ultra-low-budget series on a flyspeck station in 1988, then moved on to Comedy Central until it found its final home on Sci-Fi Channel (it will always be Sci-Fi Channel to me), where it entered my life in an grand way. Don't ask me how my 14 year-old self unlocked this life achievement. Perhaps I was so addicted to the Sci-Fi Channel that I simple stumbled over it one day. Whatever happened, my parents, for reasons I will never know, decided it wasn't inappropriate television, and let me and my younger sister watch it on a regular basis. I mean, what's so bad about a grown man schmoozing with two plastic robots and slinging PG-rated (but innuendo-rich) color commentary at terrible B-movies in the public domain?
We imprinted on Mike Nelson and Pearl Forrester, along with Bobo and Brain Guy, so we have no context for who came before. That's just the luck of our birth years ('83, '86, respectively) and supernumerary other factors that contributed to my discovering MST3K. Tom Servo and Crow are the through line, however, and were always present in some form or another.
During our antebooze era, we'd tape the episodes and/or watch the re-runs late at night (because it got funnier the later we watched it?). We were educated about classics like Space Mutiny, Space Prince, Hobgoblins, and our forever favorite, The Giant Spider Invasion. My personal view count on each of these is higher than Citizen Kane, unfortunately, and I LOVE Citizen Kane, so judge me if you must, but I'll kick any of your asses on "TCM Scene It?" any day of the week, so don't get too haughty.
In the postbooze era, MST3K became even more amusing because I'm older and wiser and I get a higher percentage of the jokes, and I don't even need beer for it to make me snort. It's a wholesome way to start the day. Some Sunday mornings, I get up and start watching on my iPad while I'm conducting my post-shower hair ritual, then carry it into the kitchen where I can continue enjoying the robot banter while drinking tea. Thank the Universe someone posted all these episodes on YouTube long ago. Re-watching Jack Frost or Quest of the Delta Knights brings me back to those idyllic olden days of VHS tapes and Tamagotchis and GameBoy fanny packs.
Due to the timing of MST3K's televisual airings, it also makes for a good measure of one's generational identity. I'm certain that most fans who found and adored the show were of the Gen X variety, because it got its start in the late 80s. But I'm also pretty sure that kids born in the early 90s had almost no exposure to this phenomenon... unless you were my little cousin Jackie, whom we treated like a little sister and thusly corrupted, er, educated in the ways of geek pursuits. Of course, only truly nerdy Oregon Trail Generation members would remember (and love!) this landmark show, so MST3K serves as an even more precise barometer for how cool you are.
I hear that Netflix is planning a revival of sorts. All I have to say is that I hope it remains as low-budget (or at least as low-budget-looking) as the original, because the God-awful costumes and upcycled DIY set pieces and props were half the fun. It also needs to be cheesy. And PG-rated. If the F-bombs fly because it's on Netflix and it won't get censored, then I'll be disappointed. The innocence will be lost. Keep it family friendly, folks. A little footbinding always makes for a more discerning and clever brand of comedy. I will be watching with narrowed eyes until they prove their worth.
I leave you with some morsels of awesomeness. Good day.
